Branded
I love that my friends and family are concerned and interested in my life. But it seems like every Sunday morning or Holiday family event, the question comes up:
"Are you seeing anyone?"
Obsessing over marriage has been a huge struggle in my life. The longer I was single, the longer my list of things that are wrong with me became. I am in my twenties; this is the time of my life that prince charming comes to slay the dragon, battle the beast, and rescue me. So, where is he? Is he lost at sea? Did I choose the wrong coffee shop the day I was supposed to meet him? Why is everyone telling me they are sorry when I respond to their question?... Sorry? Sorry for what?
I live in the south, I get that. Most people in my family were married as teenagers. My sister is two years older than me, yet six years ahead of me. But that just isn't the way my life went. And I am tired of apologizing for it or feeling as if I did something wrong along the way.
I came to know Christ (for what it really means to know Him) my junior year of college. I cannot imagine what kind of person i'd be married to if I had gotten hitched at 19. He definitely wouldn't have been a Christian, maybe not even a nice guy. THANK THE LORD that I didn't marry any of the guys I dated in college.
A fifth grade teacher doesn't bother to teach her students about calculus. It would not benefit them to know that such a difficult and complex math exists while they are still trying to conquer their multiplication tables (especially the factors of 12, those always got me). A few years ago, I was still learning basic concepts of dating the 'Christian' way, I didn't even know what I was supposed to be looking for in a man. Heck, as long as they said they went to church, they were a keeper. Because that was the kind of Christian I was-- one who 'went to church.' I didn't know there was more, and definitely wouldn't have known to look for more in a husband.
Aside from the above, I have found that being single is awesome! There are a million and one things I have learned while being single that I probably wouldn't have learned otherwise. I don't remember where I heard it, but someone once explained the idea of forfeiting seasons to me. I have gone back to that time and time again, and have even used it to encourage others. The season I am in is the season the Lord wants me in. There may be things He needs to teach me, ways He wants to use me, etc. The last thing I want to do is play leap frog over life lessons and spiritual growth and miss out on everything the Lord wants to show me.
I do look forward to marriage, and I would like to think I am taking the necessary steps in preparing myself to be a wife. Meanwhile, soaking in the abundant life I have today. There are an infinite amount of ways the Lord can use and teach me as a single woman better than He can a married woman (and many different ways to use the married woman over me), but I intend on allowing the Lord to do just that! Until He and I are both ready to enter into the next season TOGETHER.
I would love for the women at church and the distant relatives I see twice a year to ask me how I am using my singleness to benefit the Kingdom-- instead of (with good intentions, I'm sure) making me feel inadequate or that I am missing something by not being married. If I am living for the sake of the Kingdom and the Lord is using me to accomplish anything at all, and I never marry, I can say, undoubtedly, that I am satisfied.
"Are you seeing anyone?"
Obsessing over marriage has been a huge struggle in my life. The longer I was single, the longer my list of things that are wrong with me became. I am in my twenties; this is the time of my life that prince charming comes to slay the dragon, battle the beast, and rescue me. So, where is he? Is he lost at sea? Did I choose the wrong coffee shop the day I was supposed to meet him? Why is everyone telling me they are sorry when I respond to their question?... Sorry? Sorry for what?
I live in the south, I get that. Most people in my family were married as teenagers. My sister is two years older than me, yet six years ahead of me. But that just isn't the way my life went. And I am tired of apologizing for it or feeling as if I did something wrong along the way.
I came to know Christ (for what it really means to know Him) my junior year of college. I cannot imagine what kind of person i'd be married to if I had gotten hitched at 19. He definitely wouldn't have been a Christian, maybe not even a nice guy. THANK THE LORD that I didn't marry any of the guys I dated in college.
A fifth grade teacher doesn't bother to teach her students about calculus. It would not benefit them to know that such a difficult and complex math exists while they are still trying to conquer their multiplication tables (especially the factors of 12, those always got me). A few years ago, I was still learning basic concepts of dating the 'Christian' way, I didn't even know what I was supposed to be looking for in a man. Heck, as long as they said they went to church, they were a keeper. Because that was the kind of Christian I was-- one who 'went to church.' I didn't know there was more, and definitely wouldn't have known to look for more in a husband.
Aside from the above, I have found that being single is awesome! There are a million and one things I have learned while being single that I probably wouldn't have learned otherwise. I don't remember where I heard it, but someone once explained the idea of forfeiting seasons to me. I have gone back to that time and time again, and have even used it to encourage others. The season I am in is the season the Lord wants me in. There may be things He needs to teach me, ways He wants to use me, etc. The last thing I want to do is play leap frog over life lessons and spiritual growth and miss out on everything the Lord wants to show me.
I do look forward to marriage, and I would like to think I am taking the necessary steps in preparing myself to be a wife. Meanwhile, soaking in the abundant life I have today. There are an infinite amount of ways the Lord can use and teach me as a single woman better than He can a married woman (and many different ways to use the married woman over me), but I intend on allowing the Lord to do just that! Until He and I are both ready to enter into the next season TOGETHER.
I would love for the women at church and the distant relatives I see twice a year to ask me how I am using my singleness to benefit the Kingdom-- instead of (with good intentions, I'm sure) making me feel inadequate or that I am missing something by not being married. If I am living for the sake of the Kingdom and the Lord is using me to accomplish anything at all, and I never marry, I can say, undoubtedly, that I am satisfied.
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